Ahh.. classic videos. I went on a bit of a youtube stroll tonight, and i had forgotten about some of these. Japan loves American stars.. so we get some really weird commercials.. Unfortunately, i haven't seen any recent ones coming out of japan with American stars looking stupid (coined phrase is "Japandering") now that the internet has such a wide foothold with these things, but i offer some classic subaru japandering moments. "Bruce Willis is on board! Hooray!" "Awesome! Let's do a Die-Hard montage about how our vehicles are reliable!" "I don't think so." "umm.. okay, what we're you thinking about doing when you signed him." "Well, there's this creepy, empty town, and he's just kinda getting into the car.." "and then terrorists show up?" "no, he just gets into the car and says 'I'm history, i'm outta here'" "Wow. that's.. Special." "I KNOW, RIGHT!?!?" "So, we've got Bruce Wills back, but he refuses to be seen with the car." "okay? so... how do we shoot this?" "where is he now?" "i think he's just kinda waking up and grabbing something at craft services." "That'll work. Grab the camera." "Awesome! We've got DeNiro for our new ad!" "Great! What cars don't we sell in America?!?" "umm.. well, they don't get the Legacy Wagon." "PERFECT! LET'S PUT HIM IN THAT!" "Shouldn't we film him in something that we could air America too? you know, where he's from?" "**** THAT! STICK HIM IN THE WAGON!" "Mel Gibson signed to adertise with us!" "awesome! We just won the WRC world championship, we should put him in an action scene in an impreza! Maybe even some mad max references!" "nope. he's going in the legacy." "That.. okay? but like, the twin turbo awesome ones right? classic rally montage?" "Nope. He's going to drive list -fully, and we're going to talk about the seasons." "umm.. okay. what about all that money we put into winning WRC this year?" "**** it, we'll throw the logo up. happy now?" "Thrilled. You'll probably have him hugging a dude in it too.." "Now you're thinking!" "Awesome! We just signed Rod Stewart!" "WHY THE **** DID YOU HIRE ROD STEWART?!?!" "well he's got this song..." "NO, ****ING NO! THAT'S STRAIGHT UP RETARDED! HOW SOLID IS HIS CONTRACT?!!" "iron clad.. he mentioned something about people canceling them before shooting" "AND THAT WASN'T A GOD DAMNED HINT YOU MORON?!? ****."
"Just signed Jennifer Lopez!" ".... You got her to **** you, didn't you?" "Yup. Worth the Entire ad campaign." "Just promise me she won't sing, and we'll get through this." "Done." "Okay! We got Antonio Banderas!" "Cool! Do we have something with some latin charm to put him in?" "Nope, better. He's in an american muscle car making out with this hot girl" "Not as terrible as your previous suggestions.. go on." "And then, a Turbo forrester just drives by, and he's distracted from making out." "...." "I know, brilliant right? then he just utters 'Forester'" "...If I killed you, these commercials would be entered as evidence, and no jury would ever convict me."
I don't understand why the Japanese hire American actors to advertise an Australian car company. xxxxxxtreeeeeeeme!
