Official Subaru Fanboy Teeth-Gnashing and Benchracing Thread.

Discussion in 'Off-Topic' started by readymix, Oct 4, 2012.

  1. Starkall
    Offline

    Starkall Active Member

    Likes Received:
    118
    Trophy Points:
    53
    Nothing is sexier than a woman with some curtains! Lmao
     
  2. SurlyOldManMN
    Offline

    SurlyOldManMN Omdat fok jou Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,854
    Trophy Points:
    348
    Bull****. Clearly you have never seen woman with curtains in a Subaru.. with curtains.
     
    Ctracey218 likes this.
  3. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    Yeah, i added a bunch of mods and other whatnots to my Subaru...but not because it wasn't already perfect to begin with. I just wanted to make it perfect-er.
     
  4. Jerf
    Offline

    Jerf Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    579
    Trophy Points:
    178
    "I don't also drive a car, but when I do, I prefer a Subaru"
     
  5. Starkall
    Offline

    Starkall Active Member

    Likes Received:
    118
    Trophy Points:
    53
    I once dated this girl, who got in my car. She had curtains and showed me. Lmao
     
  6. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    I once drove my car downtown and some hot chick was like, "OMG are you Ken Block?!?" I said, "No, but this is a Subaru. Wanna get it on?" She was all like, "Sure! It's wayyyyyyy faster than a 350Z!" True story.
    Fun fact: Drunk chicks will always give it up for the rubles.
     
    blak04wrx, Ylime, BroCo and 2 others like this.
  7. idget
    Offline

    idget Want to pokéman? PM ShortytheFirefighter Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    4,325
    Trophy Points:
    398
    Fun fact, that chick was a ladyboy.
     
    derp, blak04wrx, ofspunk7 and 3 others like this.
  8. Starkall
    Offline

    Starkall Active Member

    Likes Received:
    118
    Trophy Points:
    53
    Lmfao!!!!!
     
  9. Driveshaft
    Offline

    Driveshaft Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    31
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Yes its true Subaru sux

     
  10. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    Don't care, she's still hot. And she was Japanese, so everything was blurry down there anyway.

    Did you know that: Bill Nye once used a Subaru to travel back in time and bitchslap a dinosaur?
    Now you know.
     
  11. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    Lol, Sheen's jelly. He doesn't have a Subaru anymore and he's pissed that mine is faster than his Porsche.
     
  12. SurlyOldManMN
    Offline

    SurlyOldManMN Omdat fok jou Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,854
    Trophy Points:
    348
    I always thought the missing link was either Bill Nye or something to do with Subaru. It all makes sense now.
     
  13. idget
    Offline

    idget Want to pokéman? PM ShortytheFirefighter Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    4,325
    Trophy Points:
    398
    I have a ****ty subaru... and a slow porsche... and a slow mulletstang... and a super fast 4runner... which is only fast bc Subaru totally owns Toyota now. Have you seen the new brz?
     
  14. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    Yeah, the Subaru BRZ/FRS is a wicked cool and stupid fast car. I heard it beat the Porsche 911.
     
  15. idget
    Offline

    idget Want to pokéman? PM ShortytheFirefighter Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    4,325
    Trophy Points:
    398
    I hear it eats pieces of **** like the 911 for breakfast. I'm just glad they didn't make the brz look like a neon.
     
    blackozone likes this.
  16. ShortytheFirefighter
    Offline

    ShortytheFirefighter Pokemans. I has none. Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,570
    Trophy Points:
    398
    Porsches are slow, everyone knows a Subaru is faster. Porsche even uses Subaru engines to make their cars quicker.
     
  17. Ylime
    Offline

    Ylime Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    234
    Trophy Points:
    248
    omgosh so maybe qutoeable quotes in this thread! and I just realized im in your sig lee haha thanks. ..did I mention my subaru is awesome because race car! subaru4lyfe. I got them hated seats too, and the powa to go along with it, I beat lambos all day long. I also have dem gold bling blings, whatchu know about that.
     
  18. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    OMG, your BOV makes me moist.
     
    BroCo likes this.
  19. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    FAST didn't exsist until FHI invented Subarus...now everybody wants to copy our idea, wtf. wannabeez.
     
  20. ShortytheFirefighter
    Offline

    ShortytheFirefighter Pokemans. I has none. Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,570
    Trophy Points:
    398
    Whatever Josh. You're just jealous because my Ford will have twice as many turbos as your Subaru.

    True story.

    Bro.
     
    BroCo likes this.
  21. Nuke
    Offline

    Nuke Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    814
    Trophy Points:
    248
    One time, at band camp, I hit boost on my 2002 wrx and blacked out
     
  22. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Please read the thread rules. Only Subaru fanboy cockriding will be tolerated in this thread.
     
  23. ofspunk7
    Offline

    ofspunk7 Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    1,147
    Trophy Points:
    298

    I blacked out in Bro's car once. It was awkward when he woke up the next morning and I had to explain why/how I broke into his garage. Since that incident I find it is best to sit in my own garage alone with the car off and make engine noises and pretend to beat other cars in races. This way no one's feelings get hurt. (and Bro doesn't have to call the cops)
     
    BroCo likes this.
  24. idget
    Offline

    idget Want to pokéman? PM ShortytheFirefighter Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    4,325
    Trophy Points:
    398
    fixt
     
  25. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    And yet, still slo. So sad. No manual, dude. If it doesn't have a stick shift, it's not a real race car.
     
  26. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    One time in my WRX, I was driving around late around Industrial. And there was this dude hanging out back there in some pro street dragster. I asked him what he's got in that thing, and he's all "blah blah blah, 4 speed automatic, yadda yadda." And I was like "lol, automatic! dude we should totally race for pink slips."
    So, he pulls on his suspenders and we line the cars up. And on the third honk, I stomp on it. And not only did I beat him, but I was all like "haha, gaylord, maybe next time get a manual, or at least 5 gears in your tranny." He reluctantly handed over his car's pinkslip, which, strangely wasn't pink, but whatever, he signed it over.
    I'd show you guys the drag car I won with my WRX, but it was so stupid, slow, RWD and automatic that I called the junker to come pick it up the next morning. They wanted me to pay them 40 bucks to pick it up, but I was like "how bout I race your tow truck, and if I win, you haul this junk away for free?"
    He kinda stared at me for what seemed like 5 minutes, and then he rolled his eyes and said "whatever, I'll just take it."
     
  27. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    Twice the turboz...twice the slow. Unless it somehow becomes a Subaru Taurus...it will never be fast, Mr. Slowerton. Nice try tho.
     
    ShortytheFirefighter likes this.
  28. ofspunk7
    Offline

    ofspunk7 Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    1,147
    Trophy Points:
    298
    A hoodscoop might give your SHO a chance

    [​IMG]
     
    ShortytheFirefighter likes this.
  29. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Yeah, it's like this:
    "We just can't compete with the Subaru. Maybe if we added a second turbo we could keep up with them?"
    "Yeah, but we have the wrong blue oval on the front."
    "We could just put subaru logos there instead of Ford"
    "No, that wont work, we don't have the magical super-exotic sports car parts they do."
    "Yeah, I guess we just have to admit defeat on this one, again. Like usual. Subaru is the ultimate econo-hatch-sports-exotic-supercar."

    Then a collective sad face.
     
    ShortytheFirefighter likes this.
  30. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Some Subarus have ROOF scoops, I don't see how just ONE scoop is going to help anything against Godzilla.
     
    ofspunk7 likes this.
  31. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    ^Exactly! I mean, the proof is in the fact that Mitsubishi has already tried to copy us already. They weren't successful, obviously.

    My Subaru brings all the girls to the yard, they could have a ride....but i'd have to charge, my supercar....is faster than yours, that Taurus is a slow ass barge.
     
  32. SurlyOldManMN
    Offline

    SurlyOldManMN Omdat fok jou Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,854
    Trophy Points:
    348
    *swoon*

    [​IMG]
     
  33. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    Taurus owner, i'm assuming? Looks like he's got twin turbos in his shoes.
     
    blak04wrx likes this.
  34. ofspunk7
    Offline

    ofspunk7 Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    1,147
    Trophy Points:
    298
    Yeah subie owners are sexy

    [​IMG]
     
  35. SurlyOldManMN
    Offline

    SurlyOldManMN Omdat fok jou Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,854
    Trophy Points:
    348
    Turbo shoes? Too much awesome for a Taurus owner. Clearly a forthcoming Subaru product.
     
    ShortytheFirefighter likes this.
  36. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Looks like he slept on his arms last night
     
  37. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Or turbo socks, if you are more the sleeper type.
     
    tangledupinblu likes this.
  38. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    That's a pic of a Mitsu wannabe impersonating a Subaru owner Derrick...his bill is not flat enough.
     
    ofspunk7 likes this.
  39. Driveshaft
    Offline

    Driveshaft Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    31
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Subaru the original blue oval.
     
  40. twiztid_rs
    Offline

    twiztid_rs Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    347
    Trophy Points:
    268
    [​IMG]


    Subaru is greatest superracercar EVA!!!!! Its the only car that can harness lightning bolts inside flames!!!!! all others fail!!!! MOAR FASTER THAN U!!!
     
  41. blackozone
    Offline

    blackozone Well-Known Member

    Likes Received:
    945
    Trophy Points:
    298
    I once raced a dump truck for pink slips. Then I gave him the truck back, because it's not a Subaru.
    Why condescending generosity? Because Subaru.

    Fun Fact: Subarus have been known to congregate into packs and hunt and kill lesser vehicles. Which is every other vehicle.
     
    ShortytheFirefighter likes this.
  42. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Yeah, history says Henry FORD made automobiles first. But in reality, Subaru came up with them way before hand, and they were faster than Fords from day one. They just didn't feel like making them for the unwashed masses at the time. Even back in the 1800's, Subarus were highly rare exotic sports marvels.
     
  43. tangledupinblu
    Offline

    tangledupinblu Event Coordinator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    7,734
    Trophy Points:
    573
    True story!

    Also, 'Subaru' translated means "all other cars suck bawlz and are slower", in Japanese.
     
  44. readymix
    Offline

    readymix ...Lest ye be trod upon... Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    2,746
    Trophy Points:
    473
    Also, each one was hand made, just like they are now. That lazy butthole, Henry Ford, came up with assembly lines because he was too much of a limp-wristed a-hole to do the work himself.
     
    blackozone and tangledupinblu like this.
  45. BroCo
    Offline

    BroCo Moderator Staff Member

    Likes Received:
    1,007
    Trophy Points:
    348
    Not many people know the "True" history behind Subaru. For example. The Nina, the Pinta and the Santa Maria were all Subaru powered boats. Most think they were powered by wind, but the real story points to twin turbo's. The Brits attempted to give chase but were quickly left in the dust when the Pilgrims got into boost.
     

Share This Page