once a cheater always a cheater?

if she can't be straight and honest with you, personally i dont think its worth it man. dont deal with the stress just to try and save what you think is there. i know its easier said than done, but i think its best to let it go, atleast for now.

 

been there done that my friend save yourself the heartache and cut all ties....

 

honestly, I wouldnt have got back togather with her if she would have told me the WHOLE truth the FIRST time.

 

anyone who cuts corners and doesn't tell the whole truth isnt worth it...trust me ive been there....

 

So why are you staying with her now?

Jump ship, dude.

You just completed any argument you've ever had with yourself over staying with her right there in your own words. Emotion and attachment are holding you to her against your better judgment. There are times to follow your heart but after reading this thread it's patently obvious that this is not the case, here.

If you don't end it now, it will end later. People will say things likem "Sorry, Timster. It sucks man. It really hurts. Blah blah blah." But if they're like me they will be thinking in their heads, "What an idiot. He said it himself and we all told him that the whole relationship was doomed like the Titanic and... what an idiot."

Don't be that idiot that people are forced to lie to because they like you. Leave. Now.

 

Take the advice you've been given and think about it. It has come from many people who have been cheated on and are a lot happier where they are now. You don't have to dump her, but you shouldn't feel bad when she fights back, she's only trying to manipulate you to making you feel bad for her rather than facing the truth that she is a lying C*CK suck.

 

THIS!!! This is exactly why I never stayed with anyone of the people who've cheated on me. I hate knowing people feel bad for me and think I'm an idiot. Even though they understand that sometimes your heart just fools you they still think you are an idiot.

 

hmmm. I will be drinking heavily tonight on that note.

I know it seems nuts but its very hard for me to explain the feelings I have for her, I honestly dont think I could find anyone like her, thats why I am riding the storm out.....

 

Drinking isn't the answer. You don't wanna do that, you want to surround yourself with friends and family, even a pet. You need to have a good time and get your head off not drown your head in it.

 

I completely agree though etchy, I will be thinking on this topic and I thank you all for the input.

 

thats the best idea I have heared in a while.

erik come over and help me strip the geo interior!

no, I am having a friend over tonite and we will be wrenching on my love geo.

 

There you go! Everyone wishes you well, have a good night!

 

I agree with readymix.

From personal experience on both sides of the door...once a cheat always a cheat.

It's a commitment issue. Some people are always waiting for the next thing with one foot out the door.

To be honest, if you have a reason to think that she's cheating on you, she probably is. Just for future thought.

 

Meh, I've chased around bad-news women I've fallen in love with even though my better sense told me not to. It sucks to see the same thing in someone else so I generally try not to pull punches and speak frankly.

Go wrench. That's something I need to do, too.

 

Whenever I'm down or having issues with something, it's best to clear the head by doing something else you love to do...wrenching, playing music, looking at pRon, etc..

 

Tim, how old are you? Seriously, you have plenty of time to settle down. Cripes, I don't think anyone should get married before 25 these days.


I got burned once, and I was in a tough place for about 9 months. Thought I wanted to marry this girl, yadda yadda. Honestly, at your age, people have a lot of growth ahead of them. People change so much from 20 to 25 its crazy. Not a single person that 20-21 will believe me though, because they have no idea. I've met plenty of girls that are 21 or so, and they say, "oh, you're not that much older. WTF?" The thing is, I'm 26 and have seen it over and over and over how much people change and grow up in that time frame.

Dude, I say cut your losses and spend your time and money on your other girlfriend (subaru). Something will pop up, so don't worry about it.



Also, I know exactly what its like to be hurtin, and continue to pound beers (steelie's) untill its six on the mornin. Don't let it get in the way of your business.

 

THIS! Kick her to the curb and grab some rocking pr0n. No but seriously you'll be fine theres plenty of women out there waiting to be captivated by you

 

I know this quote is over used but honestly "there is so many fish in the sea" but honestly if your not happy it is in no ones best interest to stay in that relationship. I have been in relationships like that (tim you know who i am talking about) and honestly people don't change. You need to move on yeah its not super easy to do at first but 10 years from now you see this as so such a stupid event in your life. Your a good guy you know this I know this, you deserve someone who feels the same way about you that you do about them

just my .02

 

Turn around and walk away. Do not look back.

She cheated and lied about it as a conscious decision both times. Maybe she has 'excuses' or justifications for this - or just isn't ready for a relationship, but that doesn't really matters since she appears to have violated the first rule of any good relationship which is trust.

get drunk for a week, work on cars, do what ever you have to do to meet someone who is ready

 

List of what tim needs
1. case of brew
2. pron (ie. xnxx.com)
3. the ron burgandy with a 6 speed
4. a black geo
5. Some good friends that will be there for you
6. more pron

 

yes, im young. (19 until the 18th of oct.) and I know I have a lot of stuff to experience.

thanks guys, you are all my family (if you hate me or not)

I def have some things to figure out.

 

so how many times do you have to be treated like a douche???? before you realize and respect yourself enough to say NO.. you know NO means NO even for a guy

 

Don't waste your time. Cheating occasionally is one thing, lying constantly about minor stuff and cheating - is way worse.

 

i went thru something very similar when i was your age...lol although i am only 22 now but when i was 18/19 i went thru somethin very similiar and its just better to part ways...you can ask anybody thats been thru this that they dont regret walking away one bit...it will do you good...ask anyone here that knows me im an extremely happy person now that all i have is my car and bike and n0 bs drama...just do it man...

 

This^^^^

 

i guess it depends on the situation

 

I'm no expert on love but if she's lieing to you she doesn't respect you if she doesn't respect you she doesn't love you so you should give her the axe (figuratively) (and then literally)

 

My 0.02...

If she changes when she is alone with you vs. when you are with other people, she needs to figure out who she is as a person. When it is just the two of you she is probably the caring and loving person that you started dating....thats great, but if she changes when you are with others, then who is she really? She is a woman, so keep that in mind when her mood changes this is absolutely normal-we women tend to have many moods...but if she is changing her whole personality, then she is not ready for a long term relationship. She needs time to grow up and find herself.

If you cannot trust her now because of past cheating or her personality or her lifestyle choices, you probably never will. Some people can change, this is true, but the trust issue will never completely go away between the two of you.

Do you really love her or do you love the person that she is when she is with you? These are two different things. In order to really love and trust her you have to love all of her and respect every decision that she makes. This doesn't mean that you have to love to do everything that she does and she doesn't have to love to do everything that you do (i.e. cars and hippie music festivals). You both need to have things that you do together and that you do separately, but you have to communicate to each other about those things that you do when you are apart. She needs to have her life, you need to have your life, and you both need to have a life together that 50/50 give and take! So if you are giving 75 and she is giving 25- it isn't gonna work!

Quoted for truth!! IMO-The most important part of a relationship is communication. If you cant talk to her about any and every part of your life then you are not meant to be together. You don't have to tell her every detail of your life, and she doesn't have to tell you every detail of hers, but you must be WILLING to tell each other everything.

Overall, it sounds like you really need to take a step back or a break from each other and really assess what is good and what is bad about the relationship. You should sit down and talk to her under neutral circumstances and really talk to her-tell her what you are feeling-where things are going wrong and what is going right. When you do discuss the bad parts of your relationship-figure out what can be done to fix them-compromise with her if you have to-once you come to an agreement, mark that problem to learning!! If the problem ever arises again, remind her of what you talked about, how you fixed it and don't let your past become the present again.

I hope this helps!

 

Let her go my brother, mom and dad hate her anyways, i can totally see her being pile of turd in her 30s

I dissagree on the once a cheater always a cheater, things can change and so can people, but in this case i think you should let her go.

remember now, ive always liked her, she is a funny chick that is totally like you, but somtimes you need someone that has more opposites then matches in lifestyle. My suggestion would be to cut all ties to her, just cut her out of your life all together, summer is coming! lots of opportunities to meet women that actually have goals, she doesnt even have a job! Wow now i'm getting mad, listen to me brother!

 

The most Important thing about letting her go is LET HER GO COMPLETELY! just like jason said, don't talk to her, don't talk about her, if friends bring her up, change the subject, its easy to forget something/someone, if you don't have them in your life in any shape or form

Just like its easy to sell a car that you haven't driven in a long time

 

I must add that you are both quite young and I doubt she will mature anytime soon enough for this problem to get fixed. The fact that she is leaving for another weekend getaway says she is not going to change her ways anytime soon.

And "fish in the sea" is an old line, but look at it this way: Breaking up with this girl gives you the opportunity to meet someone better. After all, you never would have met *this* girl without breaking up with a *previous* girlfriend, and I'll bet you had at least one rough break-up before...

Take it from the old farts here: Make a clean break and never go back.

 

wow it feels great being rid of her. thanks for all of your support fellas... now...

whos got a 18+ sister?

 

+1 It is possible for someone to change, but then the question becomes is it worth the risk to wait and see if they change...

 

thred diggarr

 

This X eleventy hundred

In honestly though I remember people saying that to me when I was around 23ish and thinking "pst whatever, I have a pretty good head on." Only to look back now(27) and see how misguided I really was at that time (in general, I was actually pretty responsible). There is a reason most insurance premiums go down when people turn 25. It statistics, people become more responsible and mature in that time.

 

Silly kids.:roll:

If you love somebody, set them free. If they love you, they'll come back. If not, hunt them down like a wounded boar and smite them.:laugh:

 

hey tim i know this thread is old but we are like one in the same we both had dumb girls..who just up and do things without us knowing (mine doing one of my friends then freaking out at me because i supposedly liked another girl when i didn't) we don't need em..we move on..we rule...i mean who could resist us . Anyways they are lame..we find better womenz but for now we have our scoobies :laugh:

 

Can I just get rid of this thread now please? :roll:

 

go for it

 

just let it fall back into the cracks again.... no need to delete.

silly!

 

lock.